


Dark Side?

by AnxiousAroAce



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Cussing, M/M, Prinxiety - Freeform, Suicide, dukeceit, logicality - Freeform, remile - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:15:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23975116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnxiousAroAce/pseuds/AnxiousAroAce
Summary: After the events of Intrusive Thoughts, Virgil finds himself in a place he thought he had escaped forever. Can Roman save him? Or will Virgil decide that he doesn't want to be saved?
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	1. Virgil

"Why should you be held to a different standard than any other side?" This is it. Too late to turn back now.

"Because I used to be one of them," Casting a single look in Thomas's direction, I sink out. I can't handle the shock and disappointment present on his face. I land in the common room where Patton is yelling at Remus for killing his 'son' and boyfriend. With a dry laugh, I turn down the hall where the light sides have our rooms. This is probably the last time I will walk this way, Thomas most likely hates me now.

I flinch as a hand rests on my shoulder, Roman looking down at me, "That took some courage out there, Virgil."

I scoff, "Not that it matters. Now that Thomas knows I kept this a secret, he'll send me back to the dark sides for sure. I'm just as bad as Deceit."

His arms wrap around me, carrying me to his room. He lays me on the bed, taking the spot beside me. 

"That is nonsense, my chemically imbalanced romance," I relax as he presses a soft kiss to my temple, "You are nothing like that fiendish snake."

I know he's right, but I can't stop the voices in my head from convincing me otherwise. But what do you expect, I'm literally the embodiment of anxiety. I sigh as my head nestles into the crook of his neck. We lie there in silence, Romans heartbeat lulling me to sleep. 

Maybe sleep isn't the right word for it, as I toss and turn the entire time. Eventually my nightmares are brought to an end, my eyes opening to see my wonderful boyfriend resting beside me. Looking at the time, I see that the night has flown by, and it's now early morning. After cuddling with Roman last night, I start to think that maybe Thomas won't mind me hiding something from him. 

I shake Roman in an attempt to wake him. Unsurprisingly, he turns away from me, placing a pillow over his head to block out my voice.

"C'mon babe, wake up," I swing my legs out of the bed. He reluctantly turns to face me.

"I'm cold now," he whines pathetically. I just laugh at him as I grab a new Panic at the Disco shirt and black ripped jeans out of my drawer in his dresser. My dark stuff seems out of place in his room that seems to glow because it's so white. I head to the bathroom so I can change while he gets up.

"Virge," Roman sounds so somber compared to a minute ago, that I stop dead in my tracks, "what's happening to you?"

I follow his eyes down to the floor where my legs seem to be transparent. I try to take a step, but I have no control over my body. I watch as the rest of my body fades, powerless to stop it. I am faintly aware of the clothes hitting the floor when my hands disappear. 

Suddenly the weight of the situation hits me, flooding my mind with fear, "I don't wanna go, Ro. Don't let me go." 

My pleading seems to break Roman out his shock, and he lunges forward. But his hand goes right through me, causing him to slam into the door. As the last of my body fades into nothing, I hear Roman calling after me.

"Virge, don't leave me," his cries are the last thing I hear until the darkness envelops me. I float in nothingness for what appears to be forever, my mind jumping to the worst possible conclusions. However, none of them are as bad as the truth. 

"Hello Paranoia," I shudder at the voice, recognizing it as the one that has haunted me my entire existence, "how _awful_ to see you. _"_


	2. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A grief stricken Roman points fingers in an attempt to find his boyfriend.

"Virge," it's easily been an hour since my boyfriend vanished right before my eyes. I've been stuck in a loop, muttering his name in the hopes that it will return him to me.

"Enough wallowing in self pity," I scold as I pull myself to my feet, "you're a prince. If you want him back, then you will just have to rescue him yourself."

I throw open the door and march toward the common room with a pretend confidence I have perfected over the years. When I arrive, Thomas is in the middle of eating breakfast while watching Steven Universe. I rise up without warning, my grief erasing all common sense.

"What's up Roman," he greets me with a frown, "Are you doing okay?"

"My boyfriend just disappeared right in front of me! Do you think I'm doing okay?" I don't give him time to respond, "Now what did you do to him?"

"To who?" He seems genuinely confused, but I'm not buying his act, "You aren't making any sense. And since when do you have a boyfriend?"

"You are a peasant, I am a prince, and you are the one that is not making sense," In my anger, I slip into rhyme, "Now tell me what you did to Virgil!"

"What's wrong with Virgil? Is he okay?" Thomas continues asking similar questions, but I block him out. Why is he asking about Virgil if he is the only one that can make him vanish? As our host he can force us to be a voice in his head without a corporeal form. The anger vanishes as I realize Thomas would never do anything like that, leaving only my grief. I drop to my knees, not focused enough to remain standing.

"Logan! Patton!" I faintly hear Thomas call for my fellow sides. 

"Ah Thomas, what appears to be the problem," I know from experience that Logan is most likely adjusting his glasses as he analyzes the situation.

"I don't know what happened," Thomas starts to explain, "I was eating breakfast when Roman rose up and started yelling at me. He keeps saying I hurt Virgil."

"Roman, would you care to explain?" I drag myself to my feet, running my fingers through my hair to keep my hands busy.

"Last night Virgil freaked out about his confession, so I naturally comforted him since that is what boyfriends do."

"Hold up," I glare at Thomas for interrupting me because it is hard enough to relive this as it is, "Since when are you and Virgil dating?"

"Is it a problem? Besides, it's been going on for awhile," I honestly can't remember when our first date was. I remember it well. We went to the imagination and sat on the beach, stargazing into the early morning hours, staying awake to watch the sunrise. 

"It's not a problem, I was just curious," he then goes on to gush about how the fans will react. I can't wait to see his response to Logan and Patton dating as well. After a few minutes Logan cuts him off.

"Focus Thomas, we have more pressing matters to tend to," Logan motions toward me.

"Anyway, he woke me up at a completely outrageous hour, but before I could complain much about interrupting my beauty sleep, something strange began happening. He just started fading into thin air, starting with his feet until he was completely gone. And I tried to help, but nothing I did seemed to work," I brush away the tears threatening to fall as it dawns on me that I have no idea where he is, and that I may never see him again

"But why did you get angry with Thomas, kiddo?" I know that Patton didn't mean it, but something in his tone sounded like he was accusing me of being a bad guy. With a pang of guilt, I realize that this must be what Virgil used to feel like all of the time.

"Virgil was worried that Thomas was going to send him back to the Dark Sides, so I guess my brain just figured that must have been what happened," now that I am saying it out loud, I realize how stupid I was in thinking that, "Sorry Thomas."

"Well I have a theory on what happened, but I would not wish to cause any one of you unnecessary worry, so I will keep it to myself for the time being," Logan tries to make it sound like he doesn't care, but I can tell that deep down he is worried. That and my grief are why I haven't insulted him yet, despite the fact he is wearing his unicorn onesie.

"Lo, this is not the time to keep secrets," Patton is using his 'don't mess with my kiddo's' voice, "However bad it is, we can solve the problem better working together than alone."

Logan takes off his glasses, sighing as he rubs the bridge of his nose. After placing his glasses back on his face, he crosses his arms across his chest.

"Fine, but just remember that I might not be correct as this is just a preliminary assumption," he is just stalling for time, but I don't complain since he is making it sound like something really bad occurred, "I believe that Virgil worried so much that he reverted back to his original form unconsciously."

My mind is unable to process what he's saying because it just doesn't make sense. Luckily, Patton dumbs it down for me.

"So Virgil made himself a Dark Side?" his voice is barely a whisper, almost as if he is dreading the answer.

"Precisely."


	3. Deceit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deceit decides to have a little fun messing with Virgil.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, Deceit and Remus are kinda unsympathetic here. I didn't mean for it to happen, but the story kinda just wrote itself.

“Well what do we have here?” I stalk around Virgil as he cowers beside the couch, “Did those pesky Light Sidess finally tire of your antics and decide to rid themselves of you?”  
I watch as he slams his hand over his ears in an attempt to block me out, clenching his eyes shut so he can’t see me. Remus sends a demented grin my way.

“Go ahead,” Virgil cries out when Remus starts whispering in his mind, reminding him that he’s worthless.

“Stop!” Virgil pulls away his hands, standing up and walking toward Remus and I, “It won’t work. People care about me. Roman loves me or he wouldn’t date me.

“Oh you actually think that stuck up prince likes you?” I now know the perfect way to hurt him, “It was all a joke to him. We convinced the Light Sides to pretend they liked you. While they all thought it was a good idea, do you know who liked it the most? Who was so eager to get started on hurting you?"

The way his jaw clenches let's me know that he thinks he knows the answer. 

"It was your precious, oh so caring, father figure Patton," as the lie slips out, he takes a shocked step back.

"Y-you're wr-wr-wrong," he stutters, tears about to fall, "th-they care about m-me."

"No they don't!" He stumbles as I shove him.

He opens his mouth to argue, but instead turns and flees, presumably back to his room.

"Should we go after him?” Remus frowns as I turn to him, shaking my head.

“No let’s leave him alone for now,” I grin as an idea comes to me, “let him ponder whether I’m lying or not. After all, he  **is** Anxiety.”


	4. Remy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Light Sides request assistance from Remy and Emile to talk to Virgil.

“‘Sup Bitches,” I yell as Thomas summons me. Normally Virgil would yell at me for ruining Patton’s innocence, but the living room remains deathly silent.

“Remy,” comes Em’s chastising voice, “don’t call them that.”

I stomp my foot in annoyance as a throat clearing draws our attention. I look and noticed that my boyfriend and I are standing at the foot of the stairs, Virgil’s usual spot. That’s weird, he normally watches the filming even if he isn’t in the video.

“Why do y’all look like someone died?” I swing my head toward Roman as I hear a sharp intake of breath. It’s then that I notice the tear tracks ruining his makeup.

“Excuse Roman’s behavior, he is in quite a state of despair right now,” Logan flinches as Patton sends him a glare. I don’t blame him. I’ve been on the receiving end of that glare, and let me tell you, it is not fun.

“What Logan means is that Roman is a bit under the weather because his boyfriend is missing,” I nod in agreement with Thomas’ words.

“Ah, of course, completely underst-,” suddenly the meaning behind what he's saying. "Virgil's missing?"

My boyfriend grabs my hand in an attempt to calm me. No matter what's happening, Emile is the only one that can help me relax.

“He told Thomas that his secret, and he apparently talked himself into thinking that actually is a dark side,” Roman explains.

“Do all of you know that he used to be a dark side?” Thomas looks flabbergasted that we all knew before him.

“Of course, I’m his therapist, and Remy was his first friend in the Light Mindpalace,” Emile sounds sad, probably because Virgil will become closed off again.

“So is he back with Deceit?” when he was a dark side before, Deceit took him under his wing. That’s where he learned his tempest tongue ability. Once he was with us however, he figured out how much Deceit was manipulating him. That’s why he hates Deceit and Remus so much.

“That is what we are assuming, any ideas for how to convince Virgil to come back?” after a few minutes of searching my brain, I remember something Virgil told me after he tried to duck out.

“He will always show up for filming, no matter how mad he is,” I tell them, “However, I don’t know how much Deceit has already brainwashed him.”

"We can try to convince him that Thomas doesn't hate him by using the script," Emile explains, "He may refuse to talk freely, but the script will force him to confront you."

“It’s worth a shot,” Logan summons a notebook out of thin air, “We can have a script made in about a day, correct Roman?”

Roman just nods as Logan scribbles away on the paper, “There we go.” Logan snaps his fingers, causing the paper to disappear.

"We can try to convince him that Thomas doesn't hate him by using the script," Emile explains, "He may refuse to talk freely, but the script will force him to confront you."

“Now all we can do is wait,” as soon as Patton is done speaking, a new piece of paper flutters through the air.

“He will be there, signed D,” Logan reads.

“Alright,” Logan adjusts his glasses, “Let’s get down to business.”

I summon a new pumpkin spiced seasonal depression, considering we may be working for awhile.

**18 HOURS LATER**

With a yawn, I pick the newly printed script off of the printer, walking into the living room.

“By the way, I’ll need your cup for the video Remy,” I sigh, summoning the glass for the nerd. 

“Alright, I think we’re ready,” Thomas begins to summon Virgil, but I stop him.

“Can Emile and I watch from the stairs since the whole episode is on the couch?”

“I don’t see why not,” and with that the Paranoid side appears.


	5. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil makes an irreversible decision while he is unsure who he can trust.

I ease off my headphones as I hear several sharp knocks on my door. I look over as a split face peeks around the opening door. 

“What do you want?” I curse the shaking in my voice from my ebbing anxiety attack. I swear a look of pity crosses his face before speaking.

“I am  _ not  _ here to tell you that your friends have requested your presence soon.” It’s kind of soon to start filming the next video, but the fans will be anxious after my outburst. 

“Fine. I’ll go, but they can’t expect me to do more than read the lines after what they have done.” At first I thought that he was lying because he’s Deceit after all. Then I started to remember all the times that Patton told Thomas that they could solve the problem without me, or Roman laughing when I told them my name. Even Logan called me a defeatist. From there it was a slow spiral into all the times they mocked me. 

“Just so long as you remember who your real friends are.” I smirk as his cape catches in the door when he closes it. “I  _ totally  _ meant to do that.”

My good mood disappears as quickly as the snake himself. Dread starts to fill me at the thought of facing the Light Sides. Why would they want to see me? Surely they know that Thomas sent me back to the Dark Sides. Unless he didn’t tell them so that he can yell at me for keeping such a big secret. Different scenarios run through my mind. Roman banishing me to the imagination with the Dragon Witch. Patton disowning me as his kiddo. No matter how much I protest about it, his affection is a nice change after dealing with Deceit and Remus. 

“Why should I give them the opportunity to do any of that?” I mutter as I go lay down on my bed. In my mind there’s three options. The first is actually showing up and talking to them. However, I don’t see any reason to after how they have treated me. Staying in my room is another option, but not as feasible. They would probably show up and drag me out like before. And it would also make Deceit mad, which is something I would like to avoid. Ducking out is not an option because it’s far too painful for me to attempt right now. It takes too long, and would give enough time for the others to figure out what I am going to do. 

“That leaves one option,” I mutter, dragging myself over to the medicine cabinet. Moving aside the rest of the bottles, I grab the only one that actually matters. A long time ago Thomas was prescribed anxiety pills, but refused to take them. Everytime Thomas is given something we get a copy of it too since we are all part of him. As far as the others are concerned I threw mine away just like them. However, I sent them back to my room while they threw theirs to the bottom of a volcano in the Imagination. Yes, Princey is really that extra any chance he gets. 

I take the bottle out of the cabinet, and go back to the bed. I take off the lid to see that there are easily fifty pills inside. Dumping them into my hand strangely fills me with a sense of calm. Unlike ducking out, this should be rather painless. Ducking out is literally the act of erasing yourself from existence which is unsurprisingly quite painful. It feels like you are being torn into a million pieces while simultaneously being burned alive. The anxiety pills on the other hand should be just like falling asleep. And who doesn’t want to take an endless nap. I decide against writing notes to any of the others because they obviously don’t care about me if Deceit is to be believed. 

Before I can back out, I summon a glass of water. I swallow the pills one at a time. By the time I get to the twentieth pill my head is getting foggy. By the thirty second pill my vision is blurring around the edges. I have just barely taken the last pill when the cup falls out of my hand. I smile triumphantly because there is no way the others will be able to stop this. However, I appear to have spoken too soon. As soon as my eyes flicker closed, I feel a pull that means I am being summoned. I have just barely registered the impact of falling onto Thomas’s floor when the pills finally kick in, and I thankfully pass out. 


	6. Logan

**One Month Later**

I look to the left as I take a step out of my room. The purple door at the end of the hall remains closed as it has for the past month. Across from me is the faded red of Romans door. All of the color in the mind palace has been muted since Virgil's disappearance. I sigh before making my way to the kitchen where Patton is busy making breakfast. I take my plate of blueberry pancakes from him with a silent nod of thanks. The berries are the only way I allow myself to eat such sugary food. 

“Morning Roman,” Hearing Patton's greeting, I turn toward the creative side. His once pristine uniform is now wrinkled with several rips on the sash. Numerous scars adorn the showing skin from his many trips to the Imagination. Without Virgil causing him to worry about getting hurt. He has been going on increasingly dangerous quests without Virgil here to reprimand him for getting injured. 

“Morning Patton, Logan,” The pain in his voice makes me feel sorry for him. If something happened to Patton I know I would be beside myself with grief. Despite my protests otherwise, I do have a capacity for emotion. Since growing closer to Patton I have stopped trying to suppress what I’m feeling. Due to this fact, I have been unable to focus for the past month. Virgil and I shared a special connection due to being the left brains of the group. With his absence I have become more closed off, but I guess that’s true for all my fellow sides as well. 

“Are we still on for movie night tonight?” Patton's voice is meek as he awaits the refusal that is inevitable. 

“Sorry Padre, but I can’t,” Roman repeats his normal answer, “I have a date with the Dragon Witch that I can’t miss.”

“My research cannot wait or else I would join you Patton. Maybe tomorrow I will be available.” I have answered the same way for the past month. I have figuratively buried myself in my work, as has Patton with his baking. The rest of breakfast passes silently before we break away to our individual tasks. Before stepping into my room I look at the purple door once more, remembering the last time I stepped through the threshold. Virgil had just faded out of existence for the second time in twenty four hours, and I was determined to get to the bottom of it. When I spotted the empty pill bottle on the bed it didn’t take me long to connect the dots. The anxiety medication is harmless when taken by Thomas because they merely dulled Virgil's senses; however they appeared to become lethal when ingested by the side in question. Roman immediately wanted to go after Remus and Deceit because they were the most obvious to blame. I eventually was able to reason with him that no matter what the Dark Sides had done, it was mostly likely the transition back to being a Dark Side that drove VIrgil to this decision.

I shake my head before walking into my room. Dwelling on the past has never done any good in my experience. I pull out a notebook as I take a seat at my desk. My attempts to make a plan for Thomas’ week are futile as I keep seeing Pattons heartbroken face when his invitations are denied. Lunch passes without interruption as it’s not unusual for me to skip lunch. Patton never fails to drag me to dinner when that happens though. After several hours I am disturbed by a door slamming shut across the hall. I make a split second decision before walking across the hall and knocking on the red door. I throw open the door upon receiving no response. 

“Get your butt out to the common room Roman,” After waiting a second to see if he moves I walk over to him. Grabbing the back of his sash, I begin dragging him out of the room and downstairs. Surprisingly he doesn’t protest as I force him to sit on the couch. I snap my fingers to change Roman and I into our onesies. 

“What are you kiddos doing out here?” Patton has made his way out to the living room.

“We are going to have a movie night whether we like it or not,” I am feeling very uncharacteristically adamant about having the movie night, but my only explanation is that it was brought on by Patton feeling bad. 

“Well I’ll get the brownies out of the oven while you get the movie,” Patton turns around and goes back into the kitchen.

“What movie should we watch?” I am confused by Romans dejected tone because normally he has a list of movies at the ready for our movie nights. I turn around when I hear heavy footfalls on the staircase behind me as well as Romans widening eyes. I can’t help but smile as I spot the jacket clad side making his way toward the couch.

“How about The Black Cauldron, Princey?” I move aside as the creative side sweeps the emo off his feet. He spins around for several moments before collapsing to the ground dizzily. They break apart when the sound of glass shattering echoes through the Mind Palace. Patton rushes over to hug Virgil, leaving the brownies on the ground with the broken container.

“Salutations Virgil,” We all make our way to the couch to talk. “I trust you have recovered?”

“Yeah, I guess I have, Lo,” Virgil leans against his boyfriend's shoulder as Patton turns on the TV. “I guess I have some explaining to do?”

“Not if you don’t want to,” Roman quickly reassures him, “I believe we would all be perfectly content to relax and watch movies all night.”

“No, I need to explain my disappearance,” Virgil begins. “I am going to assume that Logan already explained my disappearance to the Dark Sides as a result of my stress. When I arrived Deceit tried to manipulate me into remaining there. I don’t blame him though, because when you are in the other Mind Palace plays tricks on your mind until you don’t know what’s true. In my confused mindset, I decided that everyone would be better off if I was gone. Since ducking out didn’t work I decided to take drastic measures. After I took the anxiety medication I reappeared in my room a week later. I have been waiting for the lingering effects from the Dark Side to wear off. Now I can confidently say that I am no longer a Dark Side.”

“Well I’m glad to hear it Virgil. Now let us begin our movie night,” with Virgil's explanation out of the way, we all settle onto the couch to waste our night with a movie marathon. 


End file.
